on “a God encounter”

I’ve had this blog for a while now and I wanted to acknowledge where I’ve been, where I’m at and where I *think* I’m headed with it.

I won’t deny that recently, this outlet has taken a far more spiritual posture than it has in times past.

I write on what I’m feeling, on what I know, and on what I’m experiencing.

I can honestly say the only explanation for my posts being filled with Christian themes, bible verses, and ‘religious’ undertones is that it’s entirely what I’ve been filled with.

I can’t really describe the shift that’s been happening.

First- from changing a lot of my forms of entertainment to Christian sources. My music has changed, my old magazine subscriptions cancelled, and new ones purchased. My book shelves are now being lined with some of the most progressive and passionate evangelical authors out there. My weekends look a bit different.

Sundays I wake up genuinely e x c i t e d for church. Waiting a full week between services just doesn’t seem like enough.

And over the past weekend at Devoted, I had some pretty major takeaways from some incredibly powerful, real, and relatable women.

So really, what’s shifted?

I kept wondering and questioning the same thing myself. Am I on some sort of kick? Where is the fire coming from? How long is it going to last?  …{Because motivation up, motivation down. That’s the way it goes–#amiright??}

I’ll wrestle with these emotions  of “Do I stay or do I go?”, “Am I in the right place?”, “Am I with the right people?”, “Am I doing the right thing?”, “Butttt where am I going next??”

{Does this sound like a bunch of noise to you? Yea, well, it feels like that, too.}

Then I came across this quote from the best known genius out there:

If you can’t explain ‘it’ to a six year old, you don’t understand it yourself.— Albert Einstein

Touchè. You know what, I don’t understand this whole ‘life’ thing. I’m probably not going to, and the beauty of it is I’m not even supposed to.  And honestly, ironically, a six-year old might actually be able to grasp it all better than most of us.

W o n d e r is a beautiful thing.

Think about it. We’re following a God we can’t see, in a lifetime we can’t measure, for an eternity we can’t fathom. Faith isn’t a bunch of facts (Bob Goff).

So as often as my moments of limited comprehension circulate, I’m reminded of one. simple. truth.

What a God! His road stretches straight and smooth. Every God direction is road-tested. Everyone who runs toward him makes it. (Psalm 18:30 MSG)

{oh right.}

keep

Him

at the center.

and

things will

f

                         a

                                           l

                                                         l

into

place.

————————————-

If that wasn’t enough realization for me in one week, during lunch with a girlfriend she clearly said to me:

“Kaitlyn, I know you’ve been a Christian for almost your whole life, but I really believe God is doing something new in you. And sometimes when you’re looking for direction, you just have to s t a y. Get planted. Ground down. Be still, and wait for further guidance. God will reveal His will to you, by the convictions of your heart, in His timing.

{eye bulge. gulp. a dry mouth swallow.}

I heard the message loud and clear. My job is not to know why, how, or when.

I’m simply told to obey, not to worry about the outcome.  –Andi Andrew

We keep shouting our opinions; but God keeps asking about our hearts. “Often the reason we’re in the dynamic or the relationship we’re in, is because we’re being trained in patience. He is chipping away at everything that doesn’t look like Jesus. Remodeling. Remaking. We’re asked to stop holding on to what he’s sculpting away. To just cooperate! The sanctification, the process by which you are changed, is His work. Not ours. I think we can all agree, that trying to change ourselves is exhausting (Priscilla Schrier). We have to choose to live from God’s love, not for it (Andi Andrew).

God isn’t an editor, He’s a creator; He’s not looking for typos in our lives, He’s looking for the beauty in them.  -Bob Goff

All this seeking + faith-based conversations with friends, loved ones, and peers, has really prompted and tested my own observations and evaluations.

What I’ve come to know and am really vibing on, is that faith alone, isn’t necessarily the answer.

The goal is a God encounter – not being told, not the mere sight or reading of a scripture, but the deep, soulful, heartfelt evidence of Christ as a living and breathing thing, making his presence and His word ever known to you.

And no, you can’t grasp it; you can’t ‘show’ or ‘prove’ it on call. It doesn’t work that way. AND that might be my favorite part of faith. It’s majestic. It’s mysterious, but it’s never fleeting. Even when we can’t explain things, we can’t envision the reason, or the navigate the course, it’s there.We will run out of resources, energy, & competency on our own accord– every. single. time. But God doesn’t need a nap or a snack before ‘dealing’ with things.

It’s through this seeking and longing that at some point, at some moment, we’re given pure testimony and we’re moved. It might be in a whisper, it might be a shout, it might be a soft touch, or a total wakeup call. But if we’re not looking for it, we’ll miss it.

It’s a relationship. Not necessarily religion.

Growing *this* relationship, like any, is a key component of actually experiencing it. Amidst our entirely sinful nature, His grace has given us a choice – a simple opportunity to believe and to l o v e (like He does). To openly accept whatever gifts and expressions he’s specially crafted for each of us to carry out as a child of God.

His plan for me is entirely different than His plan for you. But I can guarantee one thing, it’s always an invitation– rather, a demand, to play bigger. A direct call out to stop selfishly giving into whatever ‘perceived’ constraints are in our way {depression, anxiety, fear, lack of commitment, loss, negativity, victimization, vulnerability, forgiveness, anger, disorder, financial worry, etc}.

The beautiful thing is He finds us in the holes we dig for ourselves. Where we see failures; God sees foundations (Bob Goff).

It’s claiming that whatever it is you need, you have enough of it for today. Until the sun rises again tomorrow, and he renews you with just enough vigor for that day.

Virginia Beach Pier

“What most of us really want is love, but what we settle for is just a series of distractions … What distracts us will begin to define us. We don’t need to swing at every pitch.” (Bob Goff)

This past Friday, I started a 21 day fast of sorts with my church, where I plan to grow in my relationship with God. I’m banning all gluten, dairy, added sugars, fried or processed foods, and reducing my intake of caffeine and alcohol. I’m limiting myself to checking social media only 2x/day and replacing that time with prayer and devotion. Oh yea, and 4 days in, I haven’t had any gum (!!). Whoa. 

Sound intense? It is!  I’m definitely not in denial about that.  This hasn’t been, isn’t going to be, nor is meant to be easy.  And yes, it’s kinda scary. It’s a little *weird*, and it’s definitely different.

But people don’t get to choose to be courageous, they just decide to not be afraid anymore. (Bob Goff)

When you’re working on being in relationship, reducing distractions, and feeding your spirit, that’s what it takes. Because half-hearted investments won’t build anything in this world.

We like to complicate it, but the message is so very simple. For what he’s really asking us to do is to:

“Brighten up the world by reflecting who I am”.

Here’s to looking for and believing for God encounters. Here’s to discovering more of the limitations of me, and more of the increase in He. 

7c0ef89a36881d0d96e7c500937b857a

-K.V

About these ads

5 Comments

Add yours →

  1. VERY GOOD !!!!

  2. Great post, and I love the new look of the blog.

  3. Kaitlyn – I came looking for your blog this morning. Knowing you would have the words I needed to see and to hear and to let sink in. Stay present in what God is doing through you – it’s such a blessing we all crave. And thank you so much for sharing your journey.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 536 other followers

%d bloggers like this: